http://www.balki.net/blog .... musings on .NET, iPod, life, humor and travel Tue, 15 Dec 2009 19:48:52 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en Man’s colleague (#1) is furious about how we all have to bend over to accommodate the diverse cultures, interests and sensitivities.  For example, he is p*ssed that we are all encouraged to use “Happy Holidays” (a culture-neutral term) instead of “Merry Christmas”. Colleague #1: You know, everyone of ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2009/12/15/inappropriate-comment-series-52-valedictorians/ Plan your activities:  Unless you go there just to relax at the beach every single day, it pays to plan your activities ahead of time, especially those activities that have limited capacity (e.g. there are only so many seats available on the helicopter tours on a given ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2009/11/08/tips-for-a-stress-free-trip-to-hawaii/ We visited Vancouver, BC recently and had a chance to try some of the delicious Indian food.  I am just using this post to document the various spots for the posterity and of course for my next trip ;) Best Indo-Chinese food: Asian Spice ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2009/06/11/eating-joints-in-vancouver-bc-desi-style/ Man and wife get into a gondola scaling up to the top of the Whistler mountain.  A few other Canadians end up in the same gondola for the 25 minute ride. Canadian #1: Where are you guys from? Wife: Portland, Oregon Canadian #2: That’s ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2009/06/09/inappropriate-comment-series-best-coffee-in-the-world/ Man and some of his colleagues are driving to a local restaurant for lunch together.  The conversation inevitably turns to bad service and the consequences. Colleague #1: I don’t leave any tip when I receive bad service or when the waiter/waitress has an attitude. Colleague #2: Yes.  ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2009/04/06/inappropriate-comment-series-how-to-tip/ Man and family go to a religious gathering.  An extremely naughty boy (probably around 5 years old) is wreaking havoc at the community center.  An elderly gentleman starts the following conversation in an attempt to calm down the boy: Elderly Gentleman (EG): What is your name? Naughty ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2009/03/24/inappropriate-comment-series-baby-toys/ Man's wife is in labor at the hospital.  Man, the doula and the nurse have been helping his wife push the baby out for a couple hours.  As the big moment gets closer, nurse and doula observe that the man is almost ready to collapse from exhaustion, excitement and mere ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/12/27/inappropriate-comment-series-blonde-baby/ Man and wife buy several dozen candles for a special occasion and decide to return a couple dozen of them at Fred Meyer. Store return clerk: Somebody likes candles! Man & Wife: Yeah... Store clerk: Is there a reason you are returning these candles? ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/08/12/inappropriate-comment-series-who-discovered-electricity/ Man's 5-year old niece is visiting from out of town.  Our man is chatting with her to catch up on the latest happenings... Man: What grade are you in now? Niece: I finished kindergarten and will be going to 1st grade next year. Man: ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/07/28/inappropriate-comment-series-too-hard/ Man: Here's the 40$ that I owe you from last week. Friend: But you owe me 50$ What happened to the other 10 ??!??  Man: If it was meant to be you will get it somehow. http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/07/23/inappropriate-comment-series-meant-to-be/ Man's neighbor and many others in the community are getting ready for the "community garage sale" over the weekend.  Neighbor's home is closer to the street within the cul-de-sac and so is more visible to the passers-by. Neighbor: Are you doing the garage sale this year? Man: ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/06/25/inappropriate-comment-series-garage-sale-in-the-neighborhood/ Man and his geek colleagues have nothing better to do.  So, the conversation steered towards the upcoming new version of iPhone and eventually turned to a discussion on the "dream features" in an iPhone. Geek Colleague #1: I have been waiting for the GPS for a while; I am ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/06/06/inappropriate-comment-series-dream-features-in-the-new-iphone/ Man goes to Starbucks during the busy hour (which is pretty much anytime of day or night).  He orders his favorite drink (Caramel Machiato) and food (Eggs Florentine). Barista: Do you want your receipt? Man: No, that's fine. Barista: Oh, but you have been ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/06/04/inappropriate-comment-series-1000-survey/ Man and his wife go to the hospital for their umpteenth appointment during the pregnancy process.  The receptionist directs them to go meet the "Patient Billing" Clerk (PBC) first. PBC: So, you get ABC benefits as part of your insurance, your out-of-pocket max is $XYZ ... blah blah blah... ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/06/01/inappropriate-comment-series-patient-billing/ Man, his pregnant wife go out to dinner with two of their best friends and their wives.  Incidentally, the friends' wives are also pregnant (more so than our man's wife).  Although, the man's wife is pregnant, they are not ready to disclose that to the world since she is in ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/05/26/inappropriate-comment-series-pregnant-belly/ Man and some of his colleagues are attending an overview training explaining the new product-line offered by their company.  All the products are focused on making it easier for a person to self-service / automate his banking transactions. Trainer #1: Our latest product lets a business banking customer to ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/05/13/inappropriate-comment-series-electronic-banking/ Man and friends are playing Loaded Questions.  The inevitable question that begs for an inappropriate answer/comment comes up (in fact, every question and work begs for a politically incorrect answer for our man!): "What is the one thing you wanted as a child but never got?" Friend #1: Butter!  ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/05/12/inappropriate-comment-series-dinner-on-fridays/ Our man is working really hard to win a competition at work where the total steps are counted at the end of 8-week period and the teams (of 4) with highest step count win prizes (and more importantly bragging rights). Man is finding all sorts of desperate ways ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/05/03/inappropriate-comment-series-increasing-step-count-while-chasing/ Man and his wife plan to meet a bunch of other friends at the restaurant.  One friend and his wife come to the table and the wife immediately goes to the restroom while the friend is still settling down at the table... Man: Why don't you squeeze in closer ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/03/16/inappropriate-comment-series-let-me-rephrase-that/ Our man and a bunch of friends go to an exotic Mediterranean restaurant.  Everyone enjoys a sumptuous dinner and its time for dessert. Aaron, the waiter: Would you like to look at our desserts menu? Everyone: Yes, please! He comes back with the dessert ... http://www.balki.net/blog/2008/03/16/inappropriate-comment-series-licking-the-desserts/